In the name of.....

I had officially signed the papers for the donation of my dad's documents to NAS. I named the archive under my dad's name. His two priceless documents dated all the way back to 1965. It was a certificate of registration as a Singapore citizen in 1965. The other one was itinerant hawker license in 1972. The NAS was interested in archiving of these two documents when I approached them. If they dun take it, i would have probably either throw it or even chucked it somewhere in the corner. It's not that I dun wan to keep but these are just papers and he is here forever in my heart.

Even up till now, each time i'm alone.... i think of him.. i miss him terribly. Tears will just swirl up in my eyes. Before he was gone, everyday i had chores to do... i had to run up his place a few times to make sure he's okie.. bring him his meals, make sure he took his medications, chat with him, watch him fall asleep. I was so busy with him last time. Now that things have changed.. i'm still trying to get used being by myself. I'm not very close wif my mum as we have been living apart for so long. I'm so used with my dad ard me or i'm ard with him...

4 months le... i havent heal myself from the loss of him. I wonder how long am I going to take. Tho I look so bubbly, lively at work and outside... when i'm home alone, it's so diff... it's really tough.. i dun wan be home alone... i always try to make myself dead tired and plonk off to bed... it doesnt work.

I was reminded of my dad today when i aboard the feeder bus. Two old men was trying to help each other to get on. Without second thots, I went over and lend my helping hand while the rest of the crowd just looked on even the bus driver was glued to his seat. I was a little tempted to tell the bus driver off. Anyway, I held the older elderly so that he doesnt fall back when lifting his leg up the steps. As the bus was quite crowded, i make sure that the old men had place to hold while i stand behind him in case the bus jerk, i can cushion his fall. Luckily one kind soul gave up her seat for this old man.

I was glad that i was there for my dad when he needed me most. To help him wif his daily 'activities' and stuffs. His one call will make me drop everything i had on hand and rush to him immediately. I really thk god that we only live two storeys apart. He just refused to move in wif me even he was critically ill and needed special care. I quitted my job and tend to him. For 4 months, life was like rolller-coaster that i can never forget... he didnt went alone... part of me went with him......