My poor gal

Ever since dunno how many weeks ago, I have been busy with not only work, school, kids and personal well-being. But lately it's decision making. I dun have time to go sit and think or even ponder... Things have to just happened and i was left to decide on spot especially when dealing with Co's case. The father had "thrown" her out and she wanted out of his house and sight ASAP! He was irresponsible for doing this. Honestly, I only know a lie that Co told that had turned things haywired. But which kid dun lie? He didnt even bother to find out why she lied in the first place.

Yes, she was wrong to lied but as a parent, he has to teach her and find out y... instead he just blow his top and sent the poor gal out of the house. I heard from Co that in fact a few times, she was told to get inside the room for no apparent reason, just bcos he was in a foul mood. He was even shouting at her. WTF! A gal at the age of 9, she knows wat's going on, mind u... he just dun bother explaining to her, alway throwing into a fit. 3 yrs back I left him for good and yet he still dun learnt his lesson well(obviously). Now he had made this little one with so much hatred for him. He even stopped her from contacting me. If she was able to talk to me, i'm sure things wont turn out this way. Luckily I taught her how to use msn. She managed to contact me via msn secretly while the father was away for reservist. This is how i get to know wat happened to her for the two months when i wasnt able to get hold of them. She was living in fear of the father.

Now that Co is back with me for good. I have to re-adjust my schedules to fit into hers which I dun mind. I just need some time to settle some loose ends. This poor gal bcos of the father decision to "throw" her out like that had been missing school for like 2 weeks. I have trying to contact her old school principle to see if I can transfer her back. Her current school was too far for me. And worst no one is able to fetch her when the bell rings for session end. I'm worried abt her getting up at 5.30am in the morning and had to leave the hse by 6.15 to catch the public bus. It's gonna be real tough for both of us.

This blardy man refused to give the custody rights back to me. Worst come to worst I may have to see him in court for the one last time to get it back. And i make sure he will be out of our lives forever for causing such agony to my gal who almost sink to depression. But now... i really dunno how to go about it. She's one tough gal tho... hmnn same like me... I hope she can really put all these behind her and get on with her daily life. Otherwise this issue will stay with her for life which i dun wish to see it. It's bad for her well-being in growing up.

Extracted!!!

I had one of my wisdom tooth extracted just one and a half hr ago. I dun like the feeling.. it really suxs to core. I was trembling from head to toe even after the extraction was done. I couldnt feel the left side of my lips. I'm constantly cleaning my mouth wif tissue to see if i was drooling although i did swallow my saliva... i've to change the gauze every half hour... arrghh... no chewing, no smoking... i can only swallow... >.<"" think i can just go zzzz for the rest of the day.

My Exam Results

I got B for both module 1 and 2. Hmnn... must work harder for As...

Bitchology

I just love this....

When I stand up for myself and my beliefs, they call me a bitch.
When I stand up for those I love, they call me a bitch.
When I speak my mind, think my own thoughts or do things my own way, they call me a bitch.

Being a bitch means I won't compromise what's in my heart.
It means I live my life MY way.
It means I won't allow anyone to step on me.

When I refuse to tolerate injustice and speak against it, I am defined as a bitch.

The same thing happens when I take time for myself instead of being everyone's maid, or when I act a little selfish.

It means I have the courage and strength to allow myself to be who I truly am and won't become anyone else's idea of what they think I 'should' be.

I am outspoken, opinionated and determined. I want what I want and there is nothing wrong with that!

So try to stomp on me, try to douse my inner flame, try to squash every ounce of beauty I hold within me.

You won't succeed.

And if that makes me a bitch , so be it.
I embrace the title and am proud to bear it.

B - Babe
I - In
T - Total
C - Control of
H - Herself

B = Beautiful
I = Intelligent
T = Talented
C = Charming
H = Hell of a Woman

B = Beautiful
I = Individual
T = That
C = Can
H = Handle anything

Not that fortunate

I guess I'll never have that fortune to have my special "pie" and enjoy it. A first year anni oreadi can be forgotten let alone wat a V-day holds. It really had no more meaning for me. I just have to get used to this kind of routine. The first year i had everything planned, from v-day to b-day even my own b-day but not this time. I'm tired. It only make me feel more like a man rather than woman.

I just wan to be that small woman. I dun like everything to be said, lay down in black and white. It's blardy rigid. Certain things it has to be said and done, i did. I dun like to say anything and nothing can be done. That i would rather keep it in my heart.

A woman has to juggle with work, family, kids and household chores is oreadi very tough. Having a man who only busy with work and nothing else, who is tougher. So MEN, if u r reading this, u better dun complain or whine when the women decide to give u the cold shoulder. The woman never complain, u ought to be thankful. Dun think u can keep a woman waiting like she has plenty of time on hand and u think she aint bother by it. One day, this woman will just decide to pack and go. Dun even have to give u any explanation. And dun ever think woman have nothing better to do other than waiting for u. For me, i seriously dun have that kind of patience.

Make me stretch over my limits, i will give u shit. Not a pile but a pool of it.

Busy schedule

It was such a busy week! I had practically no time to blog... by the time i'm home i'm so tired. I had been busy wif Karis's wedding preparation for the maids of honor and her hen's nite. Work is busy too... results for my module 1 & 2 is going to be out this friday evening. I'm nervous! I wonder how i fare... hope everything's gonna be okay.

Today i finally collected the dresses for maids and matron(that's me) of honor... we'll be wearing the same kind of dress. Hehehe... now i got to headache for my heels... i wan to go find those strappy strappy type to match this... hmnn

Here's my freezer full of eclairs, i'm dun fancy sweet stuffs.. i bought for the man. I had order 6 packs of banana flavour and 6 packs of chocolate flavour. The man is a sucker for these elcairs. He is totally nuts for eclairs and tiramisu... awe...

Life?!

Life... wat's life all abt?

Learning, living to your fullest... It's so simple yet i cant comprehend as in action. I dunno y i wan to hide inside my turtle shell. At work, I'm perfectly ok but when i reach home, i feel so wretched. I have control over at work but not at home. Wat's wrong with me?! I always think about others but neglect myself. If i think abt myself, i become like selfish in others' eyes... Y do I bother abt wat ppl think? Is that so important? Yes to me in certain extend...

I just cant explain wat's going on in my pea brain and how my heart feels. I wish i had amnesia and start all over again... well again, certain things just cant be erased...